"What drives the salmon upstream?" A query pronounced by a young cub to his father.
"It's the struggle my son, it drives us all." The answer so simply put while remaining vague.
"What struggle?" Still the cub's curiosity persisted.
The father then continued to explain the struggle of the salmon :"From birth they are fighting for their life in an environment that consumes and recycles life with an efficiency only obtained from billions of years of evolution. Those who survive are driven with the urge to travel upstream, against the current and against the odds. Despite the difficulty they push on even as brethren fall to the strength of the increasing current. Pushing harder and harder the salmon overcomes the struggle and reaches the top, the greatest achievement of their life. Those who fell behind parish, but the salmon never looks back and only knows the end. He will push past the fighting force of the water's fury and come out victorious, a feat not many other species can attest to have earned."
"So why do we not struggle? Why is it that we so easily can stand here and disrupt their path?"
"My boy if the struggle were so that every one could do it, it would not be so worthy of it's name."
"But is that fair?"
"What is fair? Has life ever been fair in any aspect? Is it fair that the birds can fly and we are forever forced to walk the earth on dirty paws? When you start drawing comparisons in aspects of what is fair, you achieve exactly what you had originally intended to prevent: Division."
"Still, why do we choose to contribute to their struggle?"
"Those with the hardest bite and loudest growl sets the rules of the world."
"Exactly, it isn't right. Why should we be so lucky?"
"Your assessment is accurate when you pity them so. Be warned young one, pity is a guise for vanity, and us bears are a humble species. Do not show pity and in return ask for none. Instead look upon their struggle objectively and respect it's difficulty. When one makes that observation you realize the greatness of the journey that the salmon takes."
The conversation ended, but the young cub remained lost in thought. To further satisfy his thirst, he would capture a fish and ask him directly. Biting down ever so softly so that the salmon was not injured, the cub was successful in catching his next conversation. Taking the fish to a secluded spot to avoid detection from his father, the cub grew in excitement for his next set of questions. "Well Mr. Salmon, there are some things I would like to discuss with you."
"What?!" The fish was flailing around, and shouting hysterically. "You realize I'm on my way out...gone...oh lord! I can feel myself slipping! Im slipping! Aunt Clara! Is that you?"
The cub new the lack of oxygen was painful, and his death slow but he was determined to get as much out of the salmon as he could. "I apologize for the inconvenience, but I was wondering if you could satisfy some philosophical ponderings?"
"Philisophi...Inconvenience?! What in the world is a bear doing having ponderings of the philosophical nature?! Just eat me already! Do it!"
"But why? You struggle so much to simply reach this point of the stream, it doesn't bother you that it's all for nothing?"
The salmon froze, obviously never having though of that aspect before. "I guess I had always assumed our goal was to try and be eaten by you."
The observation caught the cub off guard, "Your goal was to reach this point and be eaten by a bear?"
The salmon let out a loud laugh, "Well ya! I mean we are one filthy species friend...Im talking excrement eating and bacteria with no names kinda having...its terrible. It makes no sense to us to be honest. Actually, we find it quite hilarious that you would even consider eating us. Kinda makes it all worth it." The salmon smiled one last time and took his final breath.
The cub returned to his father who had just caught himself a juicy new fish, and set down to eat it. "The hardest bite," he echoed just before he clenched down into the soft flesh of the salmon.
Smirking, the young cub agreed that it was the bite that brought him his place, but devoid of reason. It was through the salmon that he found his reason, to propagate the practical joke set forth by the subordinates who feed the survival of those shouting the loudest. The comedy was quite entertaining to the young cub, and felt it was worth the ignorance.
C.R.
Monday, May 5, 2014
Friday, April 18, 2014
Coursing the Cosmos
I've died...another statistic of the inevitable fate for all of life. Here I am, no longer attached to mortal strings and I am left without answers. What was to become of the world? Of the collision course between our galaxy and Andromeda? What was to become of the universe? Such a terrible fate to endure, to be surrounded by a universe so beautiful and mysterious yet forced to die never knowing the outcome or the even the secrets behind the mystical machinations of it's intricate process. Death...bah! Such a fate, to be traveling so much slower than light and being forced into a conscious idea of time. Time, a progression of moments that we are only conscious to because of our ability to perceive light. Relativity is truly profound in the aspect of time and light, Einstein theorized that the speed of light was constant through a vacuum in space and the same for any observer in the universe that remained in relative motion to those being observed. The speed of light being so great is such that no known particle has the energy potential to reach the speed of a photon, and in it's approach finds that time approaches zero. At the speed of light time ceases to flow, for space and time is directly related and the speed at which the photon moves essentially keeps time negligible. In essence, a photon does not possess any concept for time and only knows itself being emitted and reaching it's destination. Traveling at 300,000 km/s the photon instantaneously is absorbed by our focal lenses with no time passing in between. A free photon particle in empty space with an unhindered path will see the end of the universe in the blink of an eye.
I'm still dead though and strangely enough my consciousness remains...such a peculiar predicament.I see nothing, just darkness in all directions. It takes a moment to realize, or perhaps it took billions of years, it's quite difficult to tell when the enveloping darkness distorts the passing of time. But alas the epiphany comes...here spread out before me is space. Completely empty but unmistakably the infinite unknown. There is nothing, only emptiness, for all the stars and cosmic matter has disappeared and the universe has returned to it's natural state, empty and devoid of light. Still my mind courses with reminiscent thoughts concerning the magnificently beautiful universe and the complex system of physics that governs it's operation. How a photon only knows the end...wait! Another epiphany! My death would mean that my conscious presence towards time is null and void, causing time to be zero. If so, upon death my consciousness traveled at the speed of light and found itself at the end of everything. And so here I face a vast nothingness where billions of years pass like seconds, and each successive moment brings only darkness to the vast emptiness. It's quite depressing though not at all surprising.
In addition to my epiphany, the realization that my consciousness can travel at the speed of light under my will comes naturally. Possessing the ability to to travel so fast allows my conscious mind to travel against the flow of time, and unfold the cataclysmic events pertaining to the end of all matter. As I travel faster I begin to see matter reappearing and condensing into the last dim stars of the once dying universe. Massive explosions from dying stars appear and condense, thus revealing the ancient dynamic of matter and space. Just like life, matter lives and decays. In the decay the material is reformed and used to create new matter, just as the stars do. As the energy and gravity increases the star reduces in size until the internal energy is so great that the star instantaneously releases it all in a cloud of hydrogen, helium, oxygen, carbon, Iron and many more elements that have been found to be crucial on earth. The quantities of matter spread themselves out in the explosive diameter of the blast but gravity once again gravity prevails and pulls the matter back in towards the center, condensing into a new massive celestial object. As time reverses, this dynamic is observed and marveled at. The presence of the stars and planets spread out throughout space and time resemble atoms in a molecular structure. Each cluster of matter containing energy and reacting towards the cluster of matter beside it, as if the universe is some anatomic structure of something much greater than my conscience can even comprehend.
Still, something must be amiss, for light is not privy to the progression of moments that comprise of time and yet as I travel I still view the expanse of space folding out before me...I must have lost speed. I increase my acceleration once again actually surpass the photon in speed and immediately I am met with another vast emptiness...perhaps I went too far. Perhaps my increase in velocity has brought me to the beginning of space. Before any more thoughts can formulate an overwhelming feeling of pressure is felt and followed by an extravagant light deep in the darkest recesses of space. Far in the distance the light slowly grows, the explosive reaction throwing particles and energy into free space and establishing the relationships that modern physics would later be based on. In one instantaneous moment every bit of energy in the universe is created, and the elements that comprise of every material in the known world start to form in the fiery furnaces of young stars. Their explosions throw matter into space and is used to form planets, and eventually the milky way galaxy.
Finally through death I have achieved the ability to view the universe from beginning to end, from the end to the beginning. Even still, with the creation of everything before me the meaning of life still remains absent. In relation to the existence of space, life on earth is but a fleeting moment. When time is more easily measured in billions of years rather than minutes and seconds life becomes meaningless. Yet as intelligent life we have gained the ability to acknowledge our place among the stars. Our intelligence is so that the smartest of our species have been able to use mathematics, a man made concept, to interpret the intricate dynamics of space. Being conscious to our place among the greater system of things has completely set us apart in the universe, and yet our efforts will eventually be for nothing. Distances between solar systems are so great that other intelligent life would never be reached if any exists. The world due to natural cycles of the cosmos will be destroyed before two intelligent species interact with each other, and thus the knowledge from either species would be lost forever. I have seen the end of time, and only darkness exists. Any concept of light, matter and time is lost to the enveloping nothingness and so even if intelligent life did interact with each other, in the end nothing remains. No science, no religion, nothing. Eventually, even the universe dies...
I'm still dead though and strangely enough my consciousness remains...such a peculiar predicament.I see nothing, just darkness in all directions. It takes a moment to realize, or perhaps it took billions of years, it's quite difficult to tell when the enveloping darkness distorts the passing of time. But alas the epiphany comes...here spread out before me is space. Completely empty but unmistakably the infinite unknown. There is nothing, only emptiness, for all the stars and cosmic matter has disappeared and the universe has returned to it's natural state, empty and devoid of light. Still my mind courses with reminiscent thoughts concerning the magnificently beautiful universe and the complex system of physics that governs it's operation. How a photon only knows the end...wait! Another epiphany! My death would mean that my conscious presence towards time is null and void, causing time to be zero. If so, upon death my consciousness traveled at the speed of light and found itself at the end of everything. And so here I face a vast nothingness where billions of years pass like seconds, and each successive moment brings only darkness to the vast emptiness. It's quite depressing though not at all surprising.
In addition to my epiphany, the realization that my consciousness can travel at the speed of light under my will comes naturally. Possessing the ability to to travel so fast allows my conscious mind to travel against the flow of time, and unfold the cataclysmic events pertaining to the end of all matter. As I travel faster I begin to see matter reappearing and condensing into the last dim stars of the once dying universe. Massive explosions from dying stars appear and condense, thus revealing the ancient dynamic of matter and space. Just like life, matter lives and decays. In the decay the material is reformed and used to create new matter, just as the stars do. As the energy and gravity increases the star reduces in size until the internal energy is so great that the star instantaneously releases it all in a cloud of hydrogen, helium, oxygen, carbon, Iron and many more elements that have been found to be crucial on earth. The quantities of matter spread themselves out in the explosive diameter of the blast but gravity once again gravity prevails and pulls the matter back in towards the center, condensing into a new massive celestial object. As time reverses, this dynamic is observed and marveled at. The presence of the stars and planets spread out throughout space and time resemble atoms in a molecular structure. Each cluster of matter containing energy and reacting towards the cluster of matter beside it, as if the universe is some anatomic structure of something much greater than my conscience can even comprehend.
Still, something must be amiss, for light is not privy to the progression of moments that comprise of time and yet as I travel I still view the expanse of space folding out before me...I must have lost speed. I increase my acceleration once again actually surpass the photon in speed and immediately I am met with another vast emptiness...perhaps I went too far. Perhaps my increase in velocity has brought me to the beginning of space. Before any more thoughts can formulate an overwhelming feeling of pressure is felt and followed by an extravagant light deep in the darkest recesses of space. Far in the distance the light slowly grows, the explosive reaction throwing particles and energy into free space and establishing the relationships that modern physics would later be based on. In one instantaneous moment every bit of energy in the universe is created, and the elements that comprise of every material in the known world start to form in the fiery furnaces of young stars. Their explosions throw matter into space and is used to form planets, and eventually the milky way galaxy.
Finally through death I have achieved the ability to view the universe from beginning to end, from the end to the beginning. Even still, with the creation of everything before me the meaning of life still remains absent. In relation to the existence of space, life on earth is but a fleeting moment. When time is more easily measured in billions of years rather than minutes and seconds life becomes meaningless. Yet as intelligent life we have gained the ability to acknowledge our place among the stars. Our intelligence is so that the smartest of our species have been able to use mathematics, a man made concept, to interpret the intricate dynamics of space. Being conscious to our place among the greater system of things has completely set us apart in the universe, and yet our efforts will eventually be for nothing. Distances between solar systems are so great that other intelligent life would never be reached if any exists. The world due to natural cycles of the cosmos will be destroyed before two intelligent species interact with each other, and thus the knowledge from either species would be lost forever. I have seen the end of time, and only darkness exists. Any concept of light, matter and time is lost to the enveloping nothingness and so even if intelligent life did interact with each other, in the end nothing remains. No science, no religion, nothing. Eventually, even the universe dies...
Thursday, April 10, 2014
The Flower
In a field of flowers
you stand above all
like a white gold tower
such ease to enthrall
A blood red center
from dark to light
a color none better
compliments white
A perfect combination
all white and some red
fills the imagination
distorting the head
With golden petals
that shine like the sun
warmth that melts metals
ripe with compassion
None can deny
for refusal is mad
with you in their eye
and turning their back
To hold you in hand
a blessing of itself
with others too bland
and deserving the shelf
But you deserve a vase
with colors of the sky
and some one to appreciate
the beauty within your sight
If only you could see
how lucky one would be
to call you their own
and feel so complete
C.R.
you stand above all
like a white gold tower
such ease to enthrall
A blood red center
from dark to light
a color none better
compliments white
A perfect combination
all white and some red
fills the imagination
distorting the head
With golden petals
that shine like the sun
warmth that melts metals
ripe with compassion
None can deny
for refusal is mad
with you in their eye
and turning their back
To hold you in hand
a blessing of itself
with others too bland
and deserving the shelf
But you deserve a vase
with colors of the sky
and some one to appreciate
the beauty within your sight
If only you could see
how lucky one would be
to call you their own
and feel so complete
C.R.
Sunday, March 30, 2014
A Thoughtful Gift
A thoughtful gift death proves to be;
one escapes a world of fear and hate.
A loving curse lets no one flee.
From strife and time to war and fate
and sickness abundant, it's hunger we sate.
No don't resist, don't fight, embrace!
Its a cold warm feeling this blissful state.
The stricken already wear it on their face,
the soon to be acquiesce to fate.
No man, angel or being may remove this plate.
To eternally dream is our aspiration.
Behind this veil from God we hide,
but not from fear, we're an abomination.
Nothing we do can turn this tide,
all we can do is bide our time.
Death, fate, inevitable time.
They are the same in meaning and rhyme.
one escapes a world of fear and hate.
A loving curse lets no one flee.
From strife and time to war and fate
and sickness abundant, it's hunger we sate.
No don't resist, don't fight, embrace!
Its a cold warm feeling this blissful state.
The stricken already wear it on their face,
the soon to be acquiesce to fate.
No man, angel or being may remove this plate.
To eternally dream is our aspiration.
Behind this veil from God we hide,
but not from fear, we're an abomination.
Nothing we do can turn this tide,
all we can do is bide our time.
Death, fate, inevitable time.
They are the same in meaning and rhyme.
Saturday, March 29, 2014
A Sense of Space
Behold the sky and it's infinite grace!
A clear night blessed by a window to space,
revealing the heavens and the moon's gazing face,
millions of stars and asteroids in race.
Looking upon you and feeling so small
among planets and galaxies and networks of stars
below all of the lights, illuminating the halls
of our imagination from stars of valhall
No telling which star yet still remains
for their light still reflects and seen without strain
their distance so great but their light all array
for even past death, the light shines without feign
To think we are of unique intelligence
yet forced to acknowledge our own ignorance,
though we endeavor to understand the physical sense
with physics and chemistry, mathematics and science
A universe so great, a road without stops
its massiveness eternal, infinite yet locked
a constituent of a complex system and ops
a member of greatness and all of it's pomps
C.R.
A clear night blessed by a window to space,
revealing the heavens and the moon's gazing face,
millions of stars and asteroids in race.
Looking upon you and feeling so small
among planets and galaxies and networks of stars
below all of the lights, illuminating the halls
of our imagination from stars of valhall
No telling which star yet still remains
for their light still reflects and seen without strain
their distance so great but their light all array
for even past death, the light shines without feign
To think we are of unique intelligence
yet forced to acknowledge our own ignorance,
though we endeavor to understand the physical sense
with physics and chemistry, mathematics and science
A universe so great, a road without stops
its massiveness eternal, infinite yet locked
a constituent of a complex system and ops
a member of greatness and all of it's pomps
C.R.
Thursday, March 27, 2014
Passion
She smelled of a musky arridness complimented by a sweet aroma of pomegranate infused into the threads of her clothes due to the prolonged years of dousing herself with the same cheap perfume. The scent stung the nostrils in the most stimulating way, clinging to the hairs so that even days after one would continue to be haunted by her powerful fragrance. Her makeup, sloppily applied would layer the skin so that her synthetic white face rested upon her lightly tanned body, a bit of comedy to the look that she so vainly presented as elegant. Despite her imperfections her beauty was undeniable, though her aesthetic superficiality was not what had enthralled me. What encapsulated my passion was the overwhelming feeling that overtook me when her body was pressed against mine. With each kiss she would push herself in further, her clutching only similar to that of a cliffhanger. My hands would run though her silk red hair and retreat to the small of her back, taking in the warmth she so carelessly emitted. After an especially passionate kiss she would gaze straight into my soul with her blue crystalline eyes, melting my insides with a smirk that would draw the envy from even the most lustful gods. Slowly leaning in to where our lips barely met, eye contact was made and an understanding established as if she knew what was running through my mind; her smile evolved into an ephemeral beam that quickly faced elimination as my puckered lips signaled for her return.
Never have I felt so comfortable, so warm and at such peace than with her body pressed against me. Our arms held each other, a lock that no act of nature short of God could remove. She held a certain glimmer in her eye that sparkled within the light of the moon. Deep within she was feeling something special, something new. I knew she did, one could feel it within the pulsing of her heart. But what was it? Does my heart allow myself to comprehend the overpowering feelings that emptied into me from it's bottomless ewer? Is it even possible to sum up those fantastic feelings with one un-cliched word? Alas I shall not even attempt such an endeavor! To undertake the burden of such feelings at times seems like a farcical full-hearted kind of sojourn that could only lead to disappointment. Is it fear that causes the confusion, or simply the intimidation that I am not accustomed to feeling such powerful emotions?
Her whole aura resembled a gravitational field, I could not find the strength to separate myself from her. As long as she was near life seemed so warm, so full of color; without her life was meaningless and unbearable. Her body felt perfect against mine; her breasts against my chest, the curve of her hips outlining the arch of her back as she pressed herself into me even further. It was as if she was attempting to fuse with me, our souls coexisting as one perfect passionate being, our heart beating simultaneously in sync, never missing a beat. Father time died that night, clocks stopped ticking, the sand ceased to fall and the shadow on the dial remained still; time itself stopped for us and us alone. Her lips brushed against my neck, sending a chill from my back to my legs, throwing my balance off. The sensation of her lips upon my skin was an unparalleled pleasure only equaled to orgasmic epiphanies.
I continued to question the legitimacy of my reality. How could any of it be real? Those emotions so full of truth and purity, encumbering ones soul with the unmistakable weight of unriddable affection, planted a seed within me. I'm sure God exists, and he was blessing me with every flick of his hand. As if golden flakes were falling from the sky above I stood open armed, ready to accept her love with each and every gilded drop. Such happiness! such joy! what ecstasy! I was amazed that with each passing day my affection only grew stronger.
C.R.
Never have I felt so comfortable, so warm and at such peace than with her body pressed against me. Our arms held each other, a lock that no act of nature short of God could remove. She held a certain glimmer in her eye that sparkled within the light of the moon. Deep within she was feeling something special, something new. I knew she did, one could feel it within the pulsing of her heart. But what was it? Does my heart allow myself to comprehend the overpowering feelings that emptied into me from it's bottomless ewer? Is it even possible to sum up those fantastic feelings with one un-cliched word? Alas I shall not even attempt such an endeavor! To undertake the burden of such feelings at times seems like a farcical full-hearted kind of sojourn that could only lead to disappointment. Is it fear that causes the confusion, or simply the intimidation that I am not accustomed to feeling such powerful emotions?
Her whole aura resembled a gravitational field, I could not find the strength to separate myself from her. As long as she was near life seemed so warm, so full of color; without her life was meaningless and unbearable. Her body felt perfect against mine; her breasts against my chest, the curve of her hips outlining the arch of her back as she pressed herself into me even further. It was as if she was attempting to fuse with me, our souls coexisting as one perfect passionate being, our heart beating simultaneously in sync, never missing a beat. Father time died that night, clocks stopped ticking, the sand ceased to fall and the shadow on the dial remained still; time itself stopped for us and us alone. Her lips brushed against my neck, sending a chill from my back to my legs, throwing my balance off. The sensation of her lips upon my skin was an unparalleled pleasure only equaled to orgasmic epiphanies.
I continued to question the legitimacy of my reality. How could any of it be real? Those emotions so full of truth and purity, encumbering ones soul with the unmistakable weight of unriddable affection, planted a seed within me. I'm sure God exists, and he was blessing me with every flick of his hand. As if golden flakes were falling from the sky above I stood open armed, ready to accept her love with each and every gilded drop. Such happiness! such joy! what ecstasy! I was amazed that with each passing day my affection only grew stronger.
C.R.
Wednesday, March 26, 2014
Monday's Desperation
Every day of the week serves their own purpose. What is mine? Obviously the reputation for Friday is earned by the presence of parties and fantastic social events including pretty girls. Friday serves as the transition to the weekend, and thus by default Saturday takes the silver. Sunday, the ultimate day of relaxation and maxed procrastination takes an easy bronze. Wednesday marks the hump, midway through the week and two days before Friday. Tuesday is alright, him and I are cool. We are of the same fate, being of no real importance though I take all of the abuse. Somebody, somewhere, decided to screw me over when making the start of the standard work week. What kind of logic is that? Begin the first day of work on the second day of the week? Were they drunk? What did I do to deserve that?
Perhaps I should just leave? Is that even possible? Who needs seven days anyways, six is more than enough. I mean it's not like anyone would miss me. Maybe a change of name would do like Funday or happy-go-play-day or something. Anything else! My name has become too affiliated with pain and suffering through tormenting hangovers and a feeling of prolonged loss for laziness. All I have ever wanted was to be loved like Friday or even Saturday! Even the most minimal admiration that Wednesday receives would be better than the treatment given to me by society. I just want to be enjoyed , not treated like some prison where all inhabitants await the second their time is up.
I was once given a book on how to be happy...seriously? Give a physical book with words to an illiterate abstract concept? How am I expected to absorb the information when I lack the ability to form even the most base intellectual thought? All I have the ability to do is to feel, and all i feel is the brunt of society's disgust. Was there ever a time i was without pain? I have no idea, it has been too long and any kindness convoluted by negative affirmations. If not for this mad writer none would hear my cries and my plight. For him I am grateful, though he too has made it clear that no love is held for me. I cannot escape my fate and I suppose my place is to be hated so that others may be loved. Still, love would be nice...
I am Monday, a day of the week and I would love nothing more than the least bit of love from society.
C.R.
C.R.
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