Reality Unkind

What lies behind these eyes?
The truth veiled in a lie.
Though I still seem to try
with my strength and my might
i'm found stuck to reside
within desperate tries.
All the fire to find
but to find only ice.

I'm crazy! Lo! I'm fried!
I believe in my mind
serendipitous lies!
Reality unkind.
Lucidity behind
to wither and to die,
to suffer and to writhe
in pain and in strife.

I drink you and feel fine.
I smoke you and get high.
So my soul acts in kind
to the pleasures of thine
until we're lost in life
in tidal waves of time,
sand on an ocean side
and light in the night sky.

This sick boy won't resign.
A better fate? To die!
Ha! In their face I chide.
Oh me! Oh what a reply!
Your rebuke? My sigh.
A petition of lies
to attain the insight
of a cold burning fire.

With a closed mind you're blind.
Cant even look inside
lest look through a clear eye.
Iffin one could find sight
we would all be just fine.
Instead left here to dry.
Instead left with no sight.
Instead left a plagued mind,
so it sits, falls behind.
Its lost all of its shine
yet we resign to try.
Should we dare to ask why?
or be content in my
reality unkind?